Things I cannot stand on FaceBook (Or as my dad calls it, SpaceLook…)
The massive amounts of incorrect grammar. (But if you follow my blog, you already knew that, didn’t you?)
Political Posts trying to change someone’s mind. Really? I get it. Free speech. Speak your mind. But to those of you who simply cannot keep quiet, and feel the need to respond, argue, plead your case, name call, etc? I ask you, WHY? (That is what Messenger is for). 🙂
Boudiour shots – No. Just no. They are not for public consumption, amiright?
Pictures YOU have taken of someone out and about with the intent of making fun of them.
“Nice shorts!” “Who thinks this looks good?” “What was she thinking?” Not cool peeps. Not cool. You will all probably find it very hard to believe that somewhere, sometime I am 100% confident I have been captured in a less than flattering pose, situation or dance move. I literally warn every person I sit next to on a plane that I WILL fall asleep, and I WILL wake myself up with a snore. I also WILL hunt them down and seek undying revenge should any video depiction of said event show up on social media. Anyway, I’ll call it what it is: INTERNET BULLYING. The stuff that junior high nightmares are made of. And you wouldn’t like it if it happened to you. (WOW, she just got all high and mighty on us didn’t she??)
Before & after pics. Again. Nobody wants to see it. The body pics, just no. (See Boudoir Pics comment, above.)
But for some reason the ones that irk me are for mascara. Here’s why: The one on the left was taken last year, when I had the flu, was deyhydrated and hadn’t slept for 6 nights. The one on the right, I’m fresh, showered, just had a facial, used some cucumber eye patches, and applied 13 layers of ANY mascara. Come on.
I joke, but here’s the real issue. The “before” picture always is with NO mascara. You simply cannot see how one mascara is better than others when it is compared to a picture with NO MASCARA. Please, show us mascara A with 13 coats, and mascara B with 13 coats. AND I WANT TO SEE YOU APPLY IT AS PROOF IN THE VIDEO. (My discerning eye will catch any slight of hand tricks or shenanigans, so don’t even try.) Then, I’ll be able to see why B is the ULTIMATE mascara. Until then, I’m not buying any of it.
(NOTE: I can’t very well add a picture here as support, lest you accuse me of making fun of someone as in my soapbox comment above, now could I??)
Injuries. NO ONE WANTS TO SEE THAT. ANY of that. And what is the point? Do you think that people are at home thinking … hmmm, it’s too bad Brian had brain surgery, I sure wonder what those stitches are looking like? Hope they aren’t infected. I wonder if he’ll send some pics so I can be sure he’s following proper after-care protocol at home. We ARE concerned. We DO have sympathy. In fact, we BELIEVE YOU BRIAN, we don’t need proof that you actually did undergo that brain surgery.
Talk about a no win situation. Here’s the opposite that makes me no happier:
Vaguebooking. In short, it’s the passive-aggressive way to get your shots in at someone while making every other reader wonder “Is she talking about me” or at the very least “Who is she so mad at?” OR the ever popular “Worst Day Ever” or “Why Me?” posts. You OBVIOUSLY want to talk about it, or you wouldn’t have posted anything about it. Need some sympathy or attention? Much more likely to get it by asking directly for it. (*Shameless upcoming blog post alert!)
And another thing. If YOU are the one who is getting sucked in and posting in the comments “Oh no, Sara, what happened?” I’m not a fan of yours, either. PICK UP THE PHONE. CALL SARA. ASK HER IF SHE’S OKAY. DOES SHE NEED SOMETHING? And then, encourage her to take down that pathetic post before she loses any more self-respect. Or followers.
FAKE pictures. Thanks a lot to the jerks (no, I will NOT take it back) who post the doctored up pictures of horrifying images. I am still haunted by a photo of what happened to one woman’s breast after being infested with larvae. Can’t ever see this LOTUS pod plant again without my gag reflex kicking in.
And just last week my adorable aunt was sharing a photo about a poor dog who was blind and needed help. Her adorable granddaughter let her know “Grandma, that dog has a piece of ham on his face.”
SHAME ON YOU FB fake picture posters for DUPING us in this way. And I feeled compelled to note that my sweet Aunt was not the only one to fall for it, as evidenced by the 56,047 likes, 111,174 shares and 753 comments. SMH.
What I love on FB:
I’m still on the fence about food pics. To date, I can make a case both ways, so I’ll be sure and keep you posted when I make up my mind. I’m sure you’re dying to know. But here’s what I know I love for sure:
Exciting news with the fam. Pictures of your travels. (I actually DO want to see your vacation slide show.) Birthdays. Music. Jimmy Fallon and the Roots featuring popular artists playing classroom instruments AND James Corden’s Carpool Karaoke. Love every single one of them. Funny videos. (Funny in my book is people falling off piers, or stretchers as luck might have it), Internet sensations like Kalen Reacts. Batdad. Celeste Barber reenacting supermodel pics is always a good time. 3 year old Mila Staufer’s rants crack me up. As does “Fuckin’ Chucky” and well, anything when children are being naughty. And I love a good inspirational quote.
Keep those coming, I am entertained.
So, let’s clean it up SpaceLook Fans.
More of what I love, less of what I don’t. I spend far too much time there to have to weed through the aforementioned unpleasantries. Please and thank you.
You Heard the Lady,